Tonight should be interesting. Going out with Pete, Tim, John, and Timmy's skanky girl from South Carolina.. Hopefully I have pics
Posted by: Arleigh at 3:22 PM

New Years 100: Instead of resolutions I come up with 50 things I like about myself, and 50 things I dislike.. kinda like a recap of what I've improved on and need to improve on..Its the resolution, with out the promises.


I'll start with the good I guess:
1. Music taste- I can listen to almost anything
2. Humor- I can cheer anyone up
3. Smart-ass comebacks (kinda off the previous)
4. Amounts of Mp3's I've collected- I love my music.
5. Work Ethics- hard to find in an 18 year old.
6. Daring- I'll try almost anything within some restraints, and after I talk myself into it.
7. I laugh alot
8. Optimistic- I can find the good in anything if I look hard enough
9. My hair- it has a mind of it's own, much like me.
10. Maturity, yes it needs work but I have some for my age
11. Ability to sleep alot- its a great thing to have
12. My heart- been told alot lately, I have one large one
13. Truth- I'll tell you flat out what I'm thinking
14. Smile- Gotta love my dimples
15. Education- I like to learn even though you wouldn't believe it.
16. Artistic, I like being able to put my soul out for others to see...
17. The random ability to pick up things quickly
18. Vivid memory
19.

I'll continue tomrorow
Posted by: Arleigh at 10:44 PM

From a previous conversation tonight::


I was talking about this with one of my friends tonight- every part of my body is in love with her, and will be until I either die, or someone else sweeps me off my feet. It's not a bad feeling, not anymore atleast. Yes I miss being complete- but I know in the next few weeks/months I'll be learning the most about myself. See who really cares about you, who's your true friends, what matters really in ur life and so on. When you are with someone, nothing else matters. All that matters is u are in love and u have that person. No matter how sad I am, or how my heart is telling me to sit down, cry one more time, and try every single way to get her back. I know I need this, and things will work out how they should be as time goes by.

In the past week I have learned so much about myself, and found out who my true friends are. I've given things a try that I never would of- and slowly I'm making headway on what all is happening with me.. If that makes sense...

I'm done though- I'm off to ice my knee and clean up some clothes
Posted by: Arleigh at 12:39 AM

After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security, and you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child, and you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much of it. So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, and that you really do have worth.- Random away message
Posted by: Arleigh at 2:11 PM

I'm not the sort of person that falls in and quickly out of love, but to you I gave my affection to right from the start....Are you so strong or is all the weakness in me? Well I need to see you. I need to hold you, tight...

Feeling guilty, worried. Waking from tormented sleep....And I need you.
Posted by: Arleigh at 11:12 AM

Final CD order...

the long day is over- norah jones
the weakness in me- melissa etheridge
my skin- natalie merchant
i shall believe- sheryl crow
here with me- dido
one fine day-natalie merchant
comfortable- john mayer
hurt so much- deborah cox
wherever you are- celeste prince
forever- fisher
heaven- dj sammy(slow version)
Posted by: Arleigh at 11:05 AM

the long day is over- norah jones
here with me- dido
my skin- natalie merchant
where ever you are- celeste prince
the weakness in me- melissa etheridge
hurt so much- deborah cox
i shall believe- sheryl crow
one fine day- natalie merchant
forever- fisher
heaven- dj sammy (slow version)
comfortable- john mayer


anyone want to help with the order??
Posted by: Arleigh at 4:36 PM

Please don't say I love you,
those words touch me much too deeply
and they make my core tremble
Don't think you realize the power you have over me- Jewel

Worked until 3 today.. now I'm trying to well.. not think. If that's possible. My mind is on overload. Over stressed, and overworked. I did a redesign last night, if you didn't notice, the picture on the top will be changing weekly- or as often as I remember to take some snapshots.

I miss her, alot more than I thought I would. I can't seem to find all the puzzle pieces that I dropped..I guess I know that I can only pick up so many of them, she has the rest in the palm of her hand. The phone doesn't seem to ring at all anymore, I still have that one ring set for her- everyone else is Jingle Bells. I hate answering the phone when it plays that melody. I kno there is not point, it isn't her.
I have to learn to live for myself now, there isn't anything else to live for now. Only memories, alot of hopes and some dreams. This needs to be done right now, but my heart says that is where I belong. It knows this isn't right, but it has to be done. Has to be done.


"I'm not the sort of person that fall in and out of love quickly. But you I gave my affection right from the start."
Posted by: Arleigh at 4:17 PM

I need some inspiration.. working on xmas eve... *sigh*

>>http://www.absolutbarillius.com/ <<
Posted by: Arleigh at 1:52 PM

I simply want to send out a great big thank you to all my great friends that helped me out in the past week. I would of gone mad with out you guys!!
Posted by: Arleigh at 12:00 AM

Note to self: Grow up
Posted by: Arleigh at 12:57 AM

http://www.pangilinan.net/weblog/ <-- I really like that site.


Anyways, at work- thinking about what all I want to do to this site- what directions I want. I'm giving myself a week. I have all weekend to do this, other than partying, and every night after 530... so let's see what comes out of it.
Posted by: Arleigh at 12:09 PM

I've decided that I don't understand women at all- I mean hell it's my own sex and I don't get them at all... So all I have to say is shoot me in the fucking face.

Have you ever felt like somethings going on and you can't even fathom it, so it confuses you and just makes you sick to your stomach? Yeh. That is how I feel, so scared and worried that my stomach is in pains, and my eyes are getting bags from the lack of sleep.


Why didn't you just tell me???
Posted by: Arleigh at 9:09 AM

We've lost it all, nothing last forever. I'm sorrry I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late and now we can't go back. I'm sorry I can't be perfect. - Simple Plan

Nothing is really new, I finally think I am becoming who I was meant to be. If that makes ANY sense. How can I try to explain? I'm 18, and now nothing is making me who I am. If I decide one day to get a credit card and blow it all in one day I can (not that I will.) I have the ability to go out and find my dreams, without telling people.

You know one thing happened this week, the person that means the most to me said something. I am pretty sure it wasn't meant to be taken as it was, but well it was. I was told sometimes I think too much, and need to act. To bite the bullet. That bothered me. Alot. Anyone that really knows me knows I think thru everything I do, unless it comes to her. But that isn't the point. The point is, I used to be a rash person. If I wanted to go buy a car and could, I wouldn't research, I wouldn't see what else was out there. I would buy that car. It got me in trouble so now I'm hesitant to do things that will majorly affect me. Biking, school, etc etc. Yes, the comment bothered me, mainly because out of everyone in my life- besides my mother. She should know that is how I am. I think and I think, I dream and then I think a little bit more.

Work and more work, but the days go by fast. ::
Ya know she hasn't even left, and yet I want the days to go by quickly- so the days that will be perfect can be here. These feelings I'm grasping onto will be fullstream. I want this standing on the edge to be over, I want to be able to jump head first into it.


Posted by: Arleigh at 11:16 PM

I can see it in your eyes, in my dreams you will be mine. I can see it in your eyes, in my dreams you will be mine. I am here with you tonight, I will stay right by your side. -Ian Van Dahl

Don't really know what has been up- working full time, saving for bike/car crap. I think tahts about it.. I'll write more tomorrow I really need sleep!
Posted by: Arleigh at 10:54 PM

I can make it through the rain, I can stand up once again, on my own and I know that I'm strong enough to mend. - Mariah Carey


Biking and Bob Evans. What else does a person need?? Yummy!!! I've started to get my winter 5. I always get an extra few cuz I can't ride as much as normal.

Work is good, nice pay etc etc.
Posted by: Arleigh at 10:35 AM

I wanna know if your busy, I wanna know if your doing anything tonight, I wanna know if you miss me. I wanna know. I wanna know. - Daniel Bendinfield


It snowed, and still is. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or not. I'm not working which means money isn't going to be in the pay check. Kristen was out doing her marine thing in the woods last night- so thats not good at all. And I'm stuck at home. There's too much snow to do biking, (I tried already believe me!)

Ohwell here's some pix...















Posted by: Arleigh at 12:00 PM

Oh, I just want to hold you.
I just want to hold you.
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care...
You're here tonight.

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by your forever.- Enrique Iglesias

Well I redid the layout yet again, I think I'm going to leave this one for a bit atleast. Working 40 hours a week and training may take a toll on me ya know?? I'll write more later tonight
Posted by: Arleigh at 7:23 PM